Five Things: February edition

In light of the fact that this month has been completely insane, I thought I'd share a few things that happened this month or things that I've learned (or been reminded of).

1. Thou shalt not over-commit.  This needs to become a new commandment that I adhere to.  There have been seasons of my life where I've felt this worse than others, but this month has shown me how truly detrimental it is to my mental, emotional and physical health.  February has passed by in a frenzy, filled with a calendar that was packed to the brim, bringing on a lack of sleep, too many almond milk lattes and random moments of public emotion (i.e., crying at work.....ugh, the worst).  I think finally after thirty three years of life, this month was a major wake  up call that I can't continue at this pace.  I need to remember that for every yes, I'm saying no to something else. 
   
2. You need to read the book Daring Greatly.  I was introduced to Brene Brown, author and researcher, almost two years ago, however, I've just recently read a couple of her books.  I received her newest book, Daring Greatly, for Christmas and just finished it up.  I.loved.it.  I wanted to highlight something on every single page.  For someone who is working to overcome the constant need to please others, I found it incredibly useful.  I love this advice that she offers: "I carry a small sheet of paper in my wallet that has written on it the names of people whose opinions matter to me.  To be on that list, you have to love me for my strengths and struggles."  Note to self:  create this list.
   
3. Waiting for Shay to come home is harder some days than others.   This has been an exciting and challenging week all at the same time in our adoption journey.  On Tuesday, Shay's dossier paperwork arrived from Taiwan.  Excited does not begin to describe how we felt (notice the picture of the FedEx driver). Austin and I worked diligently to get the paperwork completed as quickly as we could. For those of you who don't know, here is short summary of what the process involves: a) you receive paperwork that is all in Mandarin, so you don't really know what you are signing b) you must get each form notarized, c) after getting each form notarized, you take the forms to the County Clerk's office to confirm your notary is legit, d) you take your confirmed notary documents to Tennessee's Secretary of State office to confirm that the County Clerk is legit and finally, e) you send all this paperwork to the Taiwan Economic and Cultural Office (TECO) in Atlanta to confirm that Tennessee is a legit state (yes, I'm not making that part up).  I've even left out some of the minor details, such having to make an exact replica copy of all this paperwork and filling out lots of forms at FedEx to get it sent via overnight mail.  On Thursday, we found out that TECO is disputing that they need to authenticate one of the forms we submitted.  This paperwork is what we will send back to Taiwan in order to get us in the system for our initial court date.  It's a struggle to not just sit and cry out of frustration.  Each day hour, I have to surrender this process to the Lord.  I know He is in control and I don't need to be consumed with worry, but it's still hard.
   
4.  Music makes a difference.  Due to this week being so challenging, I've found myself playing certain worship songs over and over and over on my drive to and from work.  When I feel myself worrying, doubting, struggling, there are certain songs I play and I feel better immediately.  My newest favorite is Francesca Battistelli's song "Strangely Dim."  This has become my new personal anthem.  It feels like it could have been written for me.  I sing it at the top of my lungs and pray that the words sink deep in my spirit. 
   I've got all these plans piled up sky high
   A thousand dreams on hold and I don't know why I
   Got a front row seat to the longest wait
   And I just can't see past the things I pray today
   But when I fix my eyes on all that You are
   Then every doubt I feel deep in my heart grows strangely dim
   All my worries fade and fall to the ground
   Cause when I seek Your face and don't look around
   Any place I'm in grows strangely dim
5. Don't buy jars of Justin's Hazelnut Butter.  Stick with the individual packets....trust me on this.  If you don't, you could find yourself eating it with a spoon and consuming half a jar at a time. (see #1 and #3 for contributing factors). 

That's all for now!  Please pray for our paperwork issues to be resolved as quickly as possible.  

Love and hugs!

Austin, Abby & Shay

Doing Life

In recent weeks and months, the idea of community has come up over and over as a consistent theme in my life. This is a topic I've really prayed about and feel like the Lord is pressing into my heart, causing me to look at it differently than ever before.  There really is a difference between being in someone's life versus doing life alongside them.  While the wording may seem similar, the two concepts are really very different.  Being in someone's life is the type of casual relationships we have with others, the ones that we get the occasional text message from, the annual FaceBook birthday message, perhaps even dinner once or twice a year.  These are people you love but they aren't part of the intimate details of your life, they don't truly know your heart, understand your struggles or even what brings you true joy.  What does doing life with someone look like?  I feel like God is continually revealing this to me. Before we started down our adoption journey, I had an idea but since then, this idea has taken on a completely different shape.  Doing life with someone is all about being real, authentic, genuine.....it's knowing and caring deeply about another person, it's taking the time to ask about struggles, offering to pray for them, making a consistent effort to spend time with them, loving them through the good days and the bad.  It's the people in your life that see you struggle, celebrate right beside you, your joy and struggle is their joy and struggle.  It's community at it's truest definition. 

We are coming off a weekend of celebrating our first official Chinese New Year.  Admittedly, before Shay entered our lives, I knew very little about this holiday or the significance.  In terms of holidays, it's the single most important one for countries or cities where a large portion of Chinese live.  While Shay is from Taiwan, it is technically a Republic of China, therefore all the major Chinese holidays and festivals are recognized and celebrated.  We started our celebrations last week when our friends Nick and Cara (Guma and Shushu to Shay) invited us over for dinner.  We walked into their home to see it beautifully decorated, complete with a delicious Chinese dinner, fortune cookies and even a ceremony where we released Chinese lanterns. Nick and Cara are doing life with us, walking with us, praying for us and celebrating every simple step (like when new photos arrive of Shay and we obsess over every detail).  This past weekend, we were blessed to be welcomed by lots of other Taiwanese adoptive families who gathered from several different states to celebrate.  While we are new to this community, it was another reminder of how God is surrounding us with genuine and authentic relationships.  As we are prepare to become parents, I can see now more than ever the value of community in our lives, right where we are.  We are so thankful for the people doing life with us:  our families, our friends (the ones both near and far), and even our new extended adoptive family--our community is growing, changing and expanding.